We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
This is the high leading the old right now
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
