I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Randomize