Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
