And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
This baby is an asshole
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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