yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
