And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
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He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
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I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I love you. Go after that dick
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize