That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
