Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
