Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
