question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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