first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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