Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Randomize