Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (409): Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better, http://tfl.nu/6vha
  Replies (6) Good night (708) Bad night (2300)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom http://tfl.nu/dq56
  Replies (12) Good night (820) Bad night (3744)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it. http://tfl.nu/o6yg
  Replies (16) Good night (3386) Bad night (1006)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper. http://tfl.nu/ip7t
  Replies (13) Good night (4566) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage. http://tfl.nu/ny20
  Replies (16) Good night (1648) Bad night (6206)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom. http://tfl.nu/t8hh
  Replies (13) Good night (635) Bad night (2090)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am. http://tfl.nu/1jzg
  Replies (1) Good night (1379) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): this is worse than the time i threw up a condom. http://tfl.nu/98sx
  Replies (15) Good night (837) Bad night (4918)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers. http://tfl.nu/lhcq
  Replies (7) Good night (1660) Bad night (1732)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem http://tfl.nu/y96p
  Replies (1) Good night (1214) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth. http://tfl.nu/xt4j
  Replies (9) Good night (1377) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you http://tfl.nu/fqb1
  Replies (0) Good night (411) Bad night (180)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home. http://tfl.nu/t0al
  Replies (1) Good night (453) Bad night (679)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush http://tfl.nu/jhnr
  Replies (0) Good night (222) Bad night (334)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use. http://tfl.nu/q2pv
  Replies (0) Good night (367) Bad night (160)

Randomize