we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
