I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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