I swear she didn't look like that last week.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
