that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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