Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
