gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Someone shit on the floor
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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