I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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