Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
