Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha

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(702): **** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha http://tfl.nu/p7u5

Replies (4) Good night (877) Bad night (721)
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(937): View more from Ohio

I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.

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(937): I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand. http://tfl.nu/sj9u

Replies (32) Good night (8500) Bad night (784)
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(260): View more from Indiana

He went soft

(631): View more from New York

Wait. During?

(260): View more from Indiana

Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.

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(260): He went soft (631): Wait. During? (260): Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH. http://tfl.nu/18lb

Replies (99) Good night (988) Bad night (16050)
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(540): View more from Virginia

I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments

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(540): I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments http://tfl.nu/peng

Replies (7) Good night (5993) Bad night (799)
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(970): View more from Colorado

Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.

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(970): Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese. http://tfl.nu/mdbn

Replies (10) Good night (7257) Bad night (1002)
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(503): View more from Oregon

well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.

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(503): well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up. http://tfl.nu/zf7z

Replies (16) Good night (1159) Bad night (4237)
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(+86): View more from China

Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.

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(+86): Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported. http://tfl.nu/uoj6

Replies (10) Good night (5820) Bad night (1389)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.

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(306): I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car. http://tfl.nu/2mw2

Replies (15) Good night (5802) Bad night (1245)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea

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(484): Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea http://tfl.nu/f1ip

Replies (5) Good night (1503) Bad night (1618)
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(347): View more from New York

his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.

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(347): his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you. http://tfl.nu/crxb

Replies (9) Good night (3376) Bad night (891)
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(417): View more from Missouri

How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?

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(417): How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave? http://tfl.nu/9xty

Replies (17) Good night (1785) Bad night (2441)
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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.

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(709): I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April. http://tfl.nu/hy0p

Replies (5) Good night (1546) Bad night (1037)
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(773): View more from Illinois

I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it

(773): View more from Illinois

It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact

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(773): I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it (773): It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact http://tfl.nu/3h4p

Replies (2) Good night (520) Bad night (927)
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(248): View more from Michigan

spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?

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(248): spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years? http://tfl.nu/coam

Replies (3) Good night (1442) Bad night (437)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.

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(330): I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes. http://tfl.nu/tcgc

Replies (1) Good night (340) Bad night (703)

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