It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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