You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
