No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
