I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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