I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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