I could have mohawked her pubes.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Randomize