he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
