i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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