did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.