This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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