Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?

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(703): View more from Virginia

He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(207): View more from Maine

he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem

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(614): View more from Ohio

The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.

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(302): View more from Delaware

I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.

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(312): View more from Illinois

I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes

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