entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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