He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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