when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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