I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
