pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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