I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
