haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins