i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
