Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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