New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
pop tarts are not kleenex
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize