I'm drive I can fine osifer
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
