when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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