got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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