FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
