the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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