I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Pants are for mortals
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize
