yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I touched a dick in church today
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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