dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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